New research reveals that more men nowadays stay at home to look after their children while their partners go out to work. So, what is it like to be a man in a woman’s world? We’ve spoken to a few stay at home dads to learn more about their world.
A stay home dad
The trend produced the term ‘ a stay at home dad,’ which refers to a husband being left in the house to take care of the kids and do household chores like cooking, laundry, cleaning, etc. In other countries, women comprise almost 50% of the total labor force, which means that more men are sharing or taking over household duties and childcare.
We are no longer a gender-driven society, and there is no shame if a man wants to become a stay home dad. Give it another decade, and it’d be more embraced by the society that wouldn’t totally hurt masculinity.
There are many reasons why men choose to be a stay home dad. Most men would assume the role because it was the best option for their families. Most decisions are connected to financial matters, especially with the rising job status and income opportunities for women.
Most men still consider the traditional beliefs that men should be the breadwinners of the family and wives should take care of the home. Relying on their wives for a living when you are still healthy and capable of working is often a source of shame. It reflects the man’s inability to do his responsibility as the provider, like how they’ve been doing it for thousands of years.
Reasons Why Husband Choose to be a stay at home dad?
What are the reasons why husbands choose the role of being house husbands? After the survey and here are the answers:
1. In most cases, the reason is because the wife is the one who can find the job, whether domestically or overseas, and someone must stay at home with the kids.
2. The wife earns a good salary compared to the husband who could possibly be out of work.
3. One of them must stay home, so instead of hiring a nanny who might not be as good or as responsible enough to take care of the house and kids, they find it more practical to have the husband stay at home.
Story about a stay at home dad
With a recent chat with my friend, Jun, he shared his story about being a househusband for three years.
When Jun’s wife found a job overseas, he has no choice but to quit his job to take care of their kids. He said it was difficult in the beginning, doing all household chores like the laundry, ironing of school uniforms, going to market, cooking, and washing the dishes.
He needed to wake up early to prepare breakfast and lunch boxes for the kids too. Aside from that, he also did some side-line jobs to earn a little income. He said, when the time came, he didn’t hesitate to be a househusband. According to him, “The family survived because I accepted the challenge with love and passion. Because if I wouldn’t do it, who would? They are my kids, and no one will love and care for them the way we parents do.” Currently, it is his turn to work overseas and support his family, and his wife is now staying at home.
Another friend of mine named Mike was recently laid off from his job. With this, they both agreed that he would stay at home. He told me, “Someone needs to sacrifice their career for the family, and whoever earns more should go to work. It will be more beneficial for the family.” It’s a big change in his life. He used to be that guy who would go out for a drink with colleagues after office work before going home, but now, he needs to wake up early to prepare breakfast, take care, and bring their kids to school.
Sometimes, people would ask him the questions whenever he attends a school meeting or meeting someone he knows in the market, “Why aren’t you at work?” or “Is it your day off today?”. This often adds stress to him, but he rather focuses on the good things of being a stay home dad. Here are the the benefits.
- More bonding time with the kids. Nowadays, he gets to play, read books, and watch movies with them, and he found it to be a rewarding job. With more time spent with your children, he can learn more about them and witness their development.
- There is no more rushing to work and no more dealing with rude bosses, whenever he could not reach his report deadlines or target.
- He can now do all the things he couldn’t find the time to do before such as repainting the wall or repairing broken things in the house.
For Jun and Mike, being a househusband is the most challenging job in the world that require proper teamwork between husband and wife, regardless what the society says. They are taking the role of the house husband because it works best for the family.
What do think about men become stay at home dads? Leave your comment below. We would love to hear from you.
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